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the vonderful vegetti



most “as seen on tv” products are ridiculous. garbage. don’t waste your money. the shake weight? how is this a thing? i fully believe the board that agreed to funding, producing, and marketing this product was made up of pre-pubescent / college aged men children who snickered and giggled their way through the presentation, and  proceeded to give each other an almost never ending round of high-fives with complimentary back slapping once their ad was approved and they watched the final spot air for the first time. what a great practical joke. haha, consumers! maybe the joke is on me, because people actually buy those things.

the veggetti is one product that sounds ridiculous but is actually fucking amazing, excuse my illicit french. the website is tacky and painfully tl;dr, the product looks so cheap that it might fall apart the second you wrap your hand around it. but their claims are true, and i can attest to the fact.

the boy thought this thing was one big fat joke when he saw the package, probably because the name somehow implies a ladies nether regions. and for some reason it does. sitting here by the sober light of lamp i’m not sure how why that’s the case but, we’ll go with it. the veggetti sounds ridiculous.

how on earth can this piece of plastic with super sharp blades transform disgusting vegetables into delicious spaghetti? there is no magic here, except the magic of psychology.

when we sat down to our plate of veggetti-fied zucchini sauteed with mushroom and garlic (topped with skrimp), i fully expected to be hungry afterwards. i’ve had plenty of meals that didn’t involve starch of some kind and the end result is always a rumbly tummy (what can i say?) but we were both completely satisfied with the amount of food on the plate and didn’t feel the need to pick and poke at snacks after. even dylan liked it – and she likes everything nothing.

i highly doubt they put this much thought into the development of the final product, but i think what’s happening – at least in our case – our brain sees something that looks suspiciously similar to pasta, or spaghetti noodles, and assumes that’s what we’re stuffing into our grocery holes. it’s a trick! also, zucchini has such a mild flavour it takes on whatever you put with it.

i don’t even work for the company and i can’t stop talking about how awesome it is. i tell anyone and everyone who will listen. will you just go and buy it already, so we can trade recipes? speaking of recipes, this is an easy one.

garlic shrimp + garlicky mushroom zucchini noodles

veggetti up two large or three medium zucchinis, cut those noodles in half (or leave them intact if you’re feeling rebellious) and set aside.

warm 1 tbsp avocado oil in a large frying pan. add 2 (or more) cloves of minced garlic. when garlic is fragrant, add 1 cup sliced organic cremini mushrooms and sautee until they reach desired texture (we like ours to have a little bounce to them, so between 3 and 5 minutes). toss zucchini noodles in to the pan in batches, stirring (or tossing) to coat evenly. you want to make sure the “noodles” are all coated and warmed, but not browned.

in a separate pan, warm 2 tbsp avocado oil and 2 – 3 cloves of garlic, minced. add pre-cooked shrimp and toss to coat. on the heat too long, a plump, juicy shrimp will become tough. you can remove them from heat before they fully curl up.

serve with a hunk of rustic bread, like potato foccacia (in hindsight, that could be why i wasn’t hungry afterwards…) and pair with a light white wine – someone at the store recommended this masi masianco pinot grigio verduzzo blend and the boy always takes the recommendations of strangers when it comes to wine (so far we have not been let down but i’m waiting for the day…).


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